The first part of this year started off with a crisp and clear revelation for me. I came across an eye-opening truth that liberated and empowered my life instantly:
LET’S STOP THE GLORIFICATION OF BUSY. WE DON’T NEED TO USE OUR BUSY-NESS AS A MEASURE OF WORTHINESS
- Jennifer Pastiloff
So simple. So delicate. Yet, I had never considered this before.
Of course we are busy. We all are. We have loads on our plate. We are buzzing bees with so much to do and so little time to do it in.
But we should not fall prey to end up using it as an excuse.
We all adore taking pride in being busy. In fact, we flaunt our busy-ness, making our lives seemingly more important to others, and to ourselves, while drifting away from our true essence.
But what I want to do is propose a handful of magic elements to become mindful about our behavior and to shift towards living with real measures of worthiness.
(1) Discover The Real Problem
Being busy is a choice. It is the accumulation of all the things we said yes to. If you are that busy, do something about it. Set your priorities straight. Take time off. Meditate. Write down your thoughts.
Often we have become numb to what is really going on. A few months ago, I started asking myself on multiple occasions why I felt what I was feeling in that moment. It was liberating. One of my best friends – a Psychology graduate – told me that these are meta-conversations with your self.
Reflecting on your own behavior, thoughts and feelings – and questioning the underlying motives for it – will actually teach you a great deal about your unconscious and your needs and dreams.
The first step towards honoring your inner soul and finding your purpose in life is to become aware of what it is that makes up the wonderful being that is you.
When we stop hiding behind a façade of excuses and automatic responses, we can unveil what is really going on in our psyche.
(2) Redefine Your Success & Thrive
Author Guy Kawasaki also propelled the truth about busy-ness into our world when he reviewed Arianna Huffington’s latest book: Thrive.
Kawasaki explains that for the majority of us, the two main metrics for success are money and power, and they drive us to work longer hours, to sleep with our phones and tablets, to miss important moments with our families, all of which impact our health. “Arianna proposes a third metric for success: thriving. When you thrive, you take care of your health, get enough sleep, and do not live to work.”
Natural and unforced actions do us good. Practicing yoga. Reading a good book. Taking a damp bath. Putting away your phone. Giving a warm hug. Running barefoot through the grass. Playing with your children. Initiating spontaneous talks with strangers. Sharing an intimate moment with your partner. Sleeping.
Thriving actions bend our time. They can slow it down to a delightful pace of simply being. They can accelerate it to the point that our heart skips a beat from excitement.
At the end of the day, it are the spaces in-between, the translucent moments shared with our loved ones in the present, that make our lives worthy.
(3) Invest in Your Well-Being
The value of play, peace and purpose is difficult for the brain to appreciate, for logic is not willing to mess with its linearity. Our society has become programmed to put guilt in the driver’s seat with every gap in its schedule.
Lists and endless responsibilities are conventionally believed to bring us closer to our goals, to help us earn money to get by and to become happy.
Yet, working harder and making more hours, do not necessarily make us better. Ending the glorification of being busy is what the divine in us holds essential for our natural healing.
Over the past year, I have discovered that I am actually more effective during work hours, if outside those hours, I actually free time to let my mind ponder, if I let go of my obligations every now and then, and if I consciously invest time in finding my way back to the source. It is then that I can truly honor my inner voice, which helps me shine brighter in both professional and private life.
(4) Empathize with Your Receiver
There is a certain list of things nobody wants to hear and nobody cares about.
“I’m so sorry I haven’t called you for months. I have been sooo busy.”
So, you are a person with responsibilities. What else?
Think about the person you are telling this too. It might affect them in a way that makes them feel less busy, which might leave them feel less important. Do you actually intend to make them feel that way?
Becoming aware of the underlying message to what we are actually saying when we claim to be busy, opens our hearts to positivity. It transforms our conversations and mindset into energizing ones.
Jennifer Pastiloff suggests an alternative conversation starter. How about next time you say;
“Hello, how are you? What have you been up to since we saw each other last?”
When you only occupy your mind with how busy you are, how tired life’s making you, and what’s next on your list – your mind becomes too clouded to appreciate the best life has to offer. Don’t miss out on all the good stuff.